I have to be honest here... For the past several months I've been in a creative lock-out. There have been many, many premature moments of excitement over this time where I've found myself visualizing what amazing things I wanted to create. There were things I had to get back to completing, things that I completed that I needed to fix, things that I had learned and needed to practice... It was unending, and it still is unending, building an ever growing list in my head all while ping-ponging around another list of neglected responsibilities.
So I started going deeper in the rabbit hole. I would fixate on all that I wanted to accomplish and the pressure started to grow on me. I'd finally get a moment to sit down in my studio and I had absolutely no clue where to start...
My list kept growing. And I found myself distracted.
I began to wonder if it was normal to feel the way I was feeling, because I had never felt so off-kilter and uninspired in my life. My work started feeling unimportant and useless.
I still feel slightly deterred even today. And I'm not even sure why...
So I figured I'd make this particular blog an entry on what is personally helping me on my way back to a familiar path-- a path that I hope will take me back to the start of when I first began to wander along the explorations of a young artist, eager to escape into a world defined beyond what was before me in day to day reality. It was just fun. No rules. And no worries.
School, before college, was a breeze. Actually, drawing in my notebook, or my sketchbook next to my schoolbook, truly helped me focus and concentrate on what was being taught. It centered me. I took good notes while I drew, though, and I made sure I did good on the tests, so I wouldn't get in trouble for drawing in class to begin with. If was doing good, they never said anything. What I was learning in class, I used to my advantage, as well, because it gave me a catalyst for ideas and inspiration that still beats wildly in my imagination today.
Fast forward to now, though, I'm still not even sure where I fell off exactly...
But I can say, I've heard that those who continue on to go to an art college fall into a trap. If you go to college for art, expectations rise upon your levels of learning and you find yourself surrounded in a new environment where you are, well, not so special or talented, anymore. A flat and jerkish, but honest, feeling. The latter is a reality I never had trouble accepting, as I was always one to prefer mentoring others and finding traits or values to admire in people and peers as one should. That was the way I got through it at least...
The expectations, however, continuously haunt me. The expectations are what keep me hanging on to learn all I can, wanting to stay fresh. It's good for keeping the brain agile, too. I think the best thing for the sensitive artist is to try not to expect every piece of work to outshine your best piece. By sensitive, I mean-- first and foremost-- subjective to your own criticisms of your own work. Beyond your own opinion, criticism is open range battlefield to whoever you show it to, and you should dodge and retreat, surrender and ally, or charge that line of fire accordingly.... All in a peaceful and constructive way of course. ;-) It really depends on the type of person you are. And this is where handling criticism and 'tougher skin' mentality come to fruition.
This could take years of developing and finessing. And it truly is a skill.
And art, in all shapes and forms, truly is subjective to its viewer's taste.
I've also found that as I get older, I keep asking myself more serious questions. For example, "What's it all about, Alphie?" I know I love it. So what's wrong? Why shouldn't it be just as important to me to keep at it as strong of a priority as it has always been for me in the past?
And then I start to get pissed at myself.
And I circle back around to finding inspiration and back to all those premature moments of excitement visualizing stuff again. It's a vicious terrible cycle, an artist's block.
So my list? I have it. A fully loaded list of work to do.
Whatever images, titles, excepts of dreams, moments of reflection-- The first thing I did was write everything down. Whatever it was that triggered a creative spark or momentum, I jotted down before it had slipped away. Yes, a great list has been built, but at least I know I'm not out of resources when I sit down to make something.
Here's what else I've done to try to conquer this crazy void. It's been liking gearing up and training for warfare on all levels.
Next, would be how I would tackle actually plopping down for a couple hours, or one quick hour, to make some magic happen... It's been rather difficult. I can make up a list of excuses, and I could start with summer fever, I could end with depression. Do I know for sure? No.
What has helped gear me up? Organizing and cleaning up my computer and accompanying hard drives. Call it a cleanse. I'd buy a huge drive and back everything up, create folders that worked as a easy system of navigation to make working more pleasant. It's such a gratifying feeling.
Especially when you can clear up 300 gigs on your stationary, defrag, disk clean up, unnecessary program removal, and top it off with a scan, and then a restart. Beautiful bliss to a diskspace packrat like me. You centered your clean up around a specific purpose-- It's a refresh. And refreshes are everywhere. They say, "Habit relieves the memory." So if organizing gives you one less thing to struggle through to get stuff done, do it.
The main folders I made are a RESOURCES folder, a BUSINESS folder, and an ARTWORK ARCHIVE. Really, whatever works best when it comes to organizing the folders and files inside of those... But, I found this main layout works best for me and I access each folder regularly.
I've had that setup for awhile, but things get busy when work gets busy and quickly your original system gets out of hand-- especially when bouncing from computer to computer and from one place to another. Thus, the clean-out is essential healing when you feel flustered to nestle into your own electronic nest.
When ready, pick your top two (maybe three) programs and create a hotkey list-- with ONLY the hotkeys you find yourself using most frequently. If you don't know them, google away. Save them all on sheet and stick it on the pinboard within close eyeshot.
Additionally, if you have a tablet, customize it to each program individually... and save the shortcuts to your desktop.
Further, inside of these three programs, customize your layout. Make it your own. Find the tools you use most, put them all together, and save the layout. I'm up to this point myself.... I've been wanting to do this for awhile now. I'm actually excited to get these programs under creative control...
I think when I finally wrap with this, I will make yet another folder on a thumb drive to take with me on offsite jobs, where I can pick and choose what setups will be useful to execute the requirements of the job in a timely manner. If it saves a half hour when slower than your intended deadline, you...are..winning.
Another thing I've been doing is going through piles of old notes throughout the years and organizing them into folders by subject matter, as well as extracting the most essential tips from lectures I've attended over the years and creating combinations of 'cheat sheets' and/or building them into my own layout. Some workflow tactics are truly treasurable.
I'm just trying to help. And I will where I can..
And, on the same token, making you aware that I came across this and didn't feel so bad anymore knowing that I AM NOT ALONE.
Bookmark good links. And keep them organized, too! ;-)
I've also made a to do list. I'm sure I've written about this in other posts. But it always helps me feel like I'm getting somewhere when I cross something off a list. Even if it's small things, art and non-art related, like pay a bill, exercise, email so-and-so, write to blog, finish drawing.... If you have time on your hands, it will truly help give you a purpose, a schedule to follow, and some feel good endorphines. If you don't get it done? Keep rolling it over to the next day and the next day-- until you finally do it.
And you will. Like I will.
But try to make a deadline if you can, and stick to it.
Like the link I posted stated somewhere, try to stay around those that are just as crazy passionate as you are about your dreams and passions. Join as many clubs as possible, hang with the industrialists to find commonality and understanding. Avoid people that make you hesitate about skills, ambitions, career choices, also, your allotted time your need to just create on a personal level... Try never feel funny about it, either. Social conditioning sucks.
Find the time and conditions for working that work best for you. And take a small sketchbook or sticky pad with you everywhere you go... I've seen some of the most spirited work on the smallest and most unlikely canvases. Business is business, but I know when it comes to my own personal work-- I work best in a soundless night or when there is no visual distractions on an empty, but not starved, stomach with a nearby hot beverage of some sort when I'm relaxed and have a couple spare hours. I've read that writers alike also have to study their habits to find their writing niches.... in order to produce their most optimal amounts of pages.
I don't have work on this one, but I definitely wanted to get this subject out there, as I know that many artists struggle sometimes to keep the faith and keep the drive going for a number of different reasons, especially as we get older or when we are young and trying to find our path.
I've always taken my work pretty seriously, so feeling this way has been like a twisted cramp I been having trouble running off. That's the closest way I can describe it.
But I'm getting back there again-- To my element, I guess. And, all of this above, is how.
I hope that it helps someone else out there.....
Have a great night or a good day where ever you may be.
And, as always, thanks for reading.
So I started going deeper in the rabbit hole. I would fixate on all that I wanted to accomplish and the pressure started to grow on me. I'd finally get a moment to sit down in my studio and I had absolutely no clue where to start...
My list kept growing. And I found myself distracted.
I began to wonder if it was normal to feel the way I was feeling, because I had never felt so off-kilter and uninspired in my life. My work started feeling unimportant and useless.
I still feel slightly deterred even today. And I'm not even sure why...
So I figured I'd make this particular blog an entry on what is personally helping me on my way back to a familiar path-- a path that I hope will take me back to the start of when I first began to wander along the explorations of a young artist, eager to escape into a world defined beyond what was before me in day to day reality. It was just fun. No rules. And no worries.
School, before college, was a breeze. Actually, drawing in my notebook, or my sketchbook next to my schoolbook, truly helped me focus and concentrate on what was being taught. It centered me. I took good notes while I drew, though, and I made sure I did good on the tests, so I wouldn't get in trouble for drawing in class to begin with. If was doing good, they never said anything. What I was learning in class, I used to my advantage, as well, because it gave me a catalyst for ideas and inspiration that still beats wildly in my imagination today.
Fast forward to now, though, I'm still not even sure where I fell off exactly...
But I can say, I've heard that those who continue on to go to an art college fall into a trap. If you go to college for art, expectations rise upon your levels of learning and you find yourself surrounded in a new environment where you are, well, not so special or talented, anymore. A flat and jerkish, but honest, feeling. The latter is a reality I never had trouble accepting, as I was always one to prefer mentoring others and finding traits or values to admire in people and peers as one should. That was the way I got through it at least...
The expectations, however, continuously haunt me. The expectations are what keep me hanging on to learn all I can, wanting to stay fresh. It's good for keeping the brain agile, too. I think the best thing for the sensitive artist is to try not to expect every piece of work to outshine your best piece. By sensitive, I mean-- first and foremost-- subjective to your own criticisms of your own work. Beyond your own opinion, criticism is open range battlefield to whoever you show it to, and you should dodge and retreat, surrender and ally, or charge that line of fire accordingly.... All in a peaceful and constructive way of course. ;-) It really depends on the type of person you are. And this is where handling criticism and 'tougher skin' mentality come to fruition.
This could take years of developing and finessing. And it truly is a skill.
And art, in all shapes and forms, truly is subjective to its viewer's taste.
I've also found that as I get older, I keep asking myself more serious questions. For example, "What's it all about, Alphie?" I know I love it. So what's wrong? Why shouldn't it be just as important to me to keep at it as strong of a priority as it has always been for me in the past?
And then I start to get pissed at myself.
And I circle back around to finding inspiration and back to all those premature moments of excitement visualizing stuff again. It's a vicious terrible cycle, an artist's block.
So my list? I have it. A fully loaded list of work to do.
Whatever images, titles, excepts of dreams, moments of reflection-- The first thing I did was write everything down. Whatever it was that triggered a creative spark or momentum, I jotted down before it had slipped away. Yes, a great list has been built, but at least I know I'm not out of resources when I sit down to make something.
Here's what else I've done to try to conquer this crazy void. It's been liking gearing up and training for warfare on all levels.
Next, would be how I would tackle actually plopping down for a couple hours, or one quick hour, to make some magic happen... It's been rather difficult. I can make up a list of excuses, and I could start with summer fever, I could end with depression. Do I know for sure? No.
What has helped gear me up? Organizing and cleaning up my computer and accompanying hard drives. Call it a cleanse. I'd buy a huge drive and back everything up, create folders that worked as a easy system of navigation to make working more pleasant. It's such a gratifying feeling.
Especially when you can clear up 300 gigs on your stationary, defrag, disk clean up, unnecessary program removal, and top it off with a scan, and then a restart. Beautiful bliss to a diskspace packrat like me. You centered your clean up around a specific purpose-- It's a refresh. And refreshes are everywhere. They say, "Habit relieves the memory." So if organizing gives you one less thing to struggle through to get stuff done, do it.
The main folders I made are a RESOURCES folder, a BUSINESS folder, and an ARTWORK ARCHIVE. Really, whatever works best when it comes to organizing the folders and files inside of those... But, I found this main layout works best for me and I access each folder regularly.
I've had that setup for awhile, but things get busy when work gets busy and quickly your original system gets out of hand-- especially when bouncing from computer to computer and from one place to another. Thus, the clean-out is essential healing when you feel flustered to nestle into your own electronic nest.
When ready, pick your top two (maybe three) programs and create a hotkey list-- with ONLY the hotkeys you find yourself using most frequently. If you don't know them, google away. Save them all on sheet and stick it on the pinboard within close eyeshot.
Additionally, if you have a tablet, customize it to each program individually... and save the shortcuts to your desktop.
Further, inside of these three programs, customize your layout. Make it your own. Find the tools you use most, put them all together, and save the layout. I'm up to this point myself.... I've been wanting to do this for awhile now. I'm actually excited to get these programs under creative control...
I think when I finally wrap with this, I will make yet another folder on a thumb drive to take with me on offsite jobs, where I can pick and choose what setups will be useful to execute the requirements of the job in a timely manner. If it saves a half hour when slower than your intended deadline, you...are..winning.
Another thing I've been doing is going through piles of old notes throughout the years and organizing them into folders by subject matter, as well as extracting the most essential tips from lectures I've attended over the years and creating combinations of 'cheat sheets' and/or building them into my own layout. Some workflow tactics are truly treasurable.
I'm just trying to help. And I will where I can..
And, on the same token, making you aware that I came across this and didn't feel so bad anymore knowing that I AM NOT ALONE.
Bookmark good links. And keep them organized, too! ;-)
I've also made a to do list. I'm sure I've written about this in other posts. But it always helps me feel like I'm getting somewhere when I cross something off a list. Even if it's small things, art and non-art related, like pay a bill, exercise, email so-and-so, write to blog, finish drawing.... If you have time on your hands, it will truly help give you a purpose, a schedule to follow, and some feel good endorphines. If you don't get it done? Keep rolling it over to the next day and the next day-- until you finally do it.
And you will. Like I will.
But try to make a deadline if you can, and stick to it.
Like the link I posted stated somewhere, try to stay around those that are just as crazy passionate as you are about your dreams and passions. Join as many clubs as possible, hang with the industrialists to find commonality and understanding. Avoid people that make you hesitate about skills, ambitions, career choices, also, your allotted time your need to just create on a personal level... Try never feel funny about it, either. Social conditioning sucks.
Find the time and conditions for working that work best for you. And take a small sketchbook or sticky pad with you everywhere you go... I've seen some of the most spirited work on the smallest and most unlikely canvases. Business is business, but I know when it comes to my own personal work-- I work best in a soundless night or when there is no visual distractions on an empty, but not starved, stomach with a nearby hot beverage of some sort when I'm relaxed and have a couple spare hours. I've read that writers alike also have to study their habits to find their writing niches.... in order to produce their most optimal amounts of pages.
I don't have work on this one, but I definitely wanted to get this subject out there, as I know that many artists struggle sometimes to keep the faith and keep the drive going for a number of different reasons, especially as we get older or when we are young and trying to find our path.
I've always taken my work pretty seriously, so feeling this way has been like a twisted cramp I been having trouble running off. That's the closest way I can describe it.
But I'm getting back there again-- To my element, I guess. And, all of this above, is how.
I hope that it helps someone else out there.....
Have a great night or a good day where ever you may be.
And, as always, thanks for reading.
